Liminal moments

Liminal moments are the periods of transition we experience between tasks.[1] These transitions of attention are dangerous. Often without you realizing it, they create uncertainty and anxiety that push you towards the false haven of distraction.

For example, consider when you're out driving and you come to a stop at a traffic light. What do you do? Do you stay focused on driving or do you start to think? How do you deal with that rumination? Do you pick up your phone or play with the radio to distract yourself?

What happens when you open a program on your computer and it takes a while to load. Do you open up another one while you wait?

What do you do between meetings at work?

If you don't beware, thirty-second liminal moments can hurry into thirty-minute regretful distractions. It might be a car accident. It might be wasted time on social media. Or it might be arriving at a meeting late and unprepared.

According to Nir Eyal in his book Indistractable, one way to manage liminal moments is to use a technique called the "ten-minute rule". During a liminal moment, if you find yourself wanting to do something to pacify your discomfort, wait ten minutes before doing it. Those ten minutes force you to do something psychologists call "surfing the urge". When you surf the urge, you ride your desire like a wave until it subsides, observing it without pushing it away or acting on it. Oftentimes, the distracting desire will pass along with the liminal moment.

Next time you find yourself seeking distraction during a liminal moment, try using the ten-minute rule and surf your urge.

Notes

[1] Nir Eyal introduced me to the concept of liminal moments in his book, Indistractable.

Have thoughts on this topic? I'd love to hear from you! I'm @RickLindquist on Twitter.